God? What are my questions?
Why am I seeking answers about God? Why don’t I just go to a temple or a church and be content with it. Why do I want a one on one equation with God?
My questions are those of Job. The first one though is that of Zophar the Naamathite ; one of the three friends who ask job to seek forgiveness from God.
‘Canst thou by searching find out God?’ Zophar asks Job. So do I ask myself.
I ask like Job, ‘In whose hand is the soul of every living thing, and the breath of all mankind?’
‘If a man die, shall he live again?’
This one is for all us writers:-
‘Oh that my words were now written! oh that they were printed in a book!’
‘Wherefore do the wicked live, become old, yea, are mighty in power?
Their seed is established in their sight with them, and their offspring before their eyes.
Their houses are safe from fear, neither is the rod of God upon them.’
‘But where shall wisdom be found? and where is the place of understanding?’
Here Job does give an answer:
‘And unto man he said, Behold, the fear of the LORD, that is wisdom; and to depart from evil is understanding.’
Job rants on and at last God deigns to appear and show Job his mighty works. Job is overawed by God’s appearance and his doubts are gone.
Then Job answered the LORD, and said,
‘I know that thou canst do every thing, and that no thought can be withholden from thee.
Who is he that hideth counsel without knowledge? therefore have I uttered that I understood not; things too wonderful for me, which I knew not.
Hear, I beseech thee, and I will speak: I will demand of thee, and declare thou unto me.
I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee.
Wherefore I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes.’
‘The LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before.
After this lived Job an hundred and forty years, and saw his sons, and his sons’ sons, even four generations.’
‘So Job died, being old and full of days.’
The thing is Job got to meet God. Will I get to meet God while I am living? Job had extreme faith and courage to question God’s fairness in dealing with people. Do I have that faith? This is really the beginning of my search for undivided faith.
“Why no! I never thought other than
That God is that great absence
In our lives, the empty silence
Within, the place where we go
Seeking, not in hope to
Arrive or find.”—RS THOMAS- VIA NEGATIVA